Trump, The Parlor Game

By mlumadue on April 19, 2020

Stuck inside and unemployed? Seen every episode of Tiger King twice? Don't have the money for Fallout 76: Wastelanders? Try this parlor game instead...

The rules are simple: Think of the most obnoxious living Hollywood (film, music, or television - no YouTube) celebrity you can, and defend to the rest of your family how that celebrity could make a better President than Donald Trump. Try to be the first in your house to reach 100.

You don't need to stop and living celebrities. You can try dead ones. Or European royals. Or historical mathematicians. If you want a quick game, use all humans that have ever lived. The variations are endless.

Here's the list I came up with for my family's first attempt, presented in no particular order.

  1. Billy Joel
  2. Kevin Spacey
  3. Jerry Seinfeld
  4. Mel Gibson
  5. Bill Murray
  6. John Mayer
  7. Stephen Collins
  8. Steve Harvey
  9. Robert Pattinson
  10. Miley Cyrus
  11. Jeremy Clarkson
  12. Michael Jordan
  13. Ellen DeGeneres
  14. Pierce Brosnan
  15. Kevin James
  16. Ryan Seacrest
  17. Amy Schumer
  18. Tommy Lee Jones
  19. Kristen Stewart
  20. Raven-Symoné
  21. Guy Fieri
  22. Cher
  23. Dan Aykroyd
  24. Laura Schlessinger
  25. Eddie Murphy
  26. Gary Busey
  27. M. Night Shyamalan
  28. Janeane Garofalo
  29. Nick Nolte
  30. Wesley Snipes
  31. Gene Simmons
  32. Randy Quaid
  33. Ben Affleck
  34. Johnny Depp
  35. Tom Brady
  36. Roman Polanski
  37. Natalie Portman
  38. William Shatner
  39. Hulk Hogan
  40. Courtney Love
  41. Hugh Grant
  42. Charlie Sheen
  43. Mike Myers
  44. Lorne Michaels
  45. Chevy Chase
  46. Any random Kardashian
  47. Bill Maher
  48. Sean Combs
  49. Flavor Flav
  50. Kirstie Alley
  51. Tom Cruise
  52. Wendy Williams
  53. Pete Townshend
  54. Kelly Ripa
  55. John Travolta
  56. Jared Leto
  57. Mark Wahlberg
  58. Steven Tyler
  59. Howard Stern
  60. Liv Tyler
  61. Bill Nye
  62. Jackie Chan
  63. Bill Cosby
  64. Maury Povich
  65. Woody Allen
  66. Brittany Spears
  67. Ben Stiller
  68. Elon Musk
  69. Sinead O'Connor
  70. Tim Allen
  71. Andy Dick
  72. Pauly Shore
  73. Corey Feldman
  74. LeAnn Rimes
  75. Jay Leno
  76. Shia LaBeouf
  77. Jennifer Lopez
  78. Matt Lauer
  79. Madonna
  80. Justin Bieber
  81. Paula Abdul
  82. Linsey Lohan
  83. Tom Arnold
  84. Matthew McConaughey
  85. Bruce Willis
  86. Alec Baldwin
  87. Kiefer Sutherland
  88. Rosie O'Donnell
  89. Sean Penn
  90. Kaley Cuoco
  91. Ariana Grande
  92. Catherine Zeta-Jones
  93. Christian Bale
  94. Rihanna
  95. Tobey Maguire
  96. Christina Aguilera
  97. Rachael Ray
  98. Russell Crowe
  99. Spike Lee
  100. Sean Connery

Did I come up with celebs that didn't make the list? Why yes, including Chris Brown, Pat Sajak and Harvey Weinstein, just to name a few. And as every day is a new low, it's a new game every day. At least it beats waiting around for Exploding Kittens to come back in stock.